Navigating Our Way to a Baby

 I never thought that at 24 I would be told that I needed to do IVF to have a family.  It is heartbreaking to hear that you having something like this wrong with you.  By that I mean Endometriosis, and a blocked tube.

We are finally at that road that we have waited for.  We have decided to do IVF.  We are shooting for October.  While we are OH SO VERY EXCITED, we are worried about coming up with $10,000-$12,000.  Our insurance does not cover anything for IVF.  This is a package that we are going to be doing if we can raise the rest of the money.  We are going to pay the same price for 2 transfers that some pay for one.  We are very fortunate that my doctor is able to provide this kind of package for us.  I have set up a donation page with youcaring.com.  The web address is:
https://www.youcaring.com/medical-fundraiser/navigating-our-way-to-a-baby/67847
 
Feel free to share this post or the donation page information.

We need to be able to pay 75% up front before the beginning of September.  September I will start all the hormone injections, testing and everything else I have to do before the egg retrieval and sperm harvest.  In October will be the actual transfer.  I will know by the end of October if I AM PREGNANT OR NOT.  If the first cycle doesn't work then we will do the second with no additional cost. 

I have gone back and forth for weeks now on if we should do this donation page or not.  Some have told me time after time that they don't know what to say to us or what they can do to help.  Well, if your able to help our dreams come true we would be forever grateful for your contribution.  If your not able to donate that is okay.  We understand times are hard.  Just be there and be supportive.  This has been a very stressful, and emotional time not just for myself but for my husband.

Well until next time........

P.S. We appreciate all of your support, donations, thoughts, prayers, and kindness more than you will ever know!

The Climb

I made a "Infertility Playlist" in itunes so I could listen to it when I was down in the dumps with everything going on.  Recently it was playing while I was driving.  Miley Cyrus' The Climb came on.  I was listening to the lyrics and it hit me.  This song is so PERFECT for our situation and others like myself.  It says everything that we feel, think and want to say.  Let me break it down for you verse by verse: 

 

"I can almost see it That dream I am dreaming But there's a voice inside my head saying "You'll never reach it" Every step I'm taking Every move I make feels Lost with no direction My faith is shaking"

 ----John and I are moving forward in most aspects toward having our own family.  We have been dreaming about this for almost a year now.  Granted we knew we eventually wanted children one day, we weren't planning on having these problems.  There is a voice inside my head and words from others saying we aren't doing the right thing and that it won't work out for the best.  There has been one issue after another in this almost year long journey with infertility and 4 year battle with Endo.  My faith is shaking so is my strength, courage and commitment to this battle we are facing.

   

"But I gotta keep trying Gotta keep my head held high There's always gonna be another mountain I'm always gonna wanna make it move Always gonna be a uphill battle Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose Ain't about how fast I get there Ain't about what's waiting on the other side It's the climb"

----I need to be strong and positive not just for John and I, but for the others that are suffering like we are.  I can not give up.  We have come too far to just quit!  There is always going to be a "Negative Nancy", or obstacle in the way.  That is just the way it is.  Rather if its finances, surgery, thyroid problems or something else.  Some think we just want to do this and do it now.  Yes, that would be awesome but in reality it isn't going to happen over night :(  It WILL happen someday.  Remember, my biological clock is ticking a lot faster than most.  However it is about what is waiting on the other side.  This journey has pushed us apart and pulled us back together again.  This "Climb" is very hard and sometimes it is hard to continue. 

 

"The struggles I'm facing The chances I'm taking Sometimes might knock me down But no, I'm not breaking I may not know it But these are the moments that I'm gonna remember most, yeah Just gotta keep going And I, I got to be strong Just keep pushing on" 

----We are taking a risk by putting my body through all of these tests, surgeries, and treatments.  They all have deffienetly have knocked me down.  I have broken down but I Keep Calm and Chive On :P  I am going to remember how this journey has brought John and I closer, pulled us apart, our families support, our friends support and that this blog has helped women around the world.  My story has been read in over 16 countries by people from all walks of life.  I have to keep pushing forward and fight this ugly battle and know I CAN DO THIS!! 

 

"'Cause there's always gonna be another mountain I'm always gonna wanna make it move Always gonna be a uphill battle Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose Ain't about how fast I get there Ain't about what's waiting on the other side It's the climb, yeah! There's always gonna be another mountain I'm always gonna wanna make it move Always gonna be an uphill battle Somebody's gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there Ain't about what's waiting on the other side It's the climb, yeah! Keep on moving, keep climbing Keep the faith, baby It's all about, it's all about the climb Keep the faith, keep your faith, whoa" 

----Believe me John and I will NOT give up!  We have a dream and it will come true one day.  One day we will have a beautiful family no matter how it happens.  This Climb has been a test for us.  So far we are passing.  I do not know how I would survive this without such an amazing support group. We are hoping, dreaming, keeping the faith, and saving for our "One Day".  We are not breaking <3

Until next time.... KEEP THE FAITH :)

Endocrinology and Other Appointment Updates

At the beginning of May I went to my first Endocrinology appointment.  It was awful.  The doctor would not listen to anything I had to say and rushed me right out.

I asked her about my fluctuating TSH levels and IVF.  She said go for it even though my TSH is all over the place.  Your TSH has to be under control to be a candidate for IVF.  This did not make me very happy.  She diagnosed me with Hashimoto's Thyroiditis even though my TSH is not too low.  I demanded medication to help some of the side effects I've been having.  She didn't want to help me.  She told me I was fat and needed to lose 20-40 pounds in the next 6 months and if I don't she will medicate me to do so.  This didn't make me happy.  The list of things that happened during this appointment goes on but I will move on.  I started Synthroid and started having "all day sickness". 

I went to my PCM a week after my Endocrinology appointment.   He was not thrilled with how that appointment went.  He said that the nausea was normal for my new medication and it should hopefully go away.  During his exam I was diagnosed with arthritis, shin splints, a sprained ankle and possible Sciatica.  They did x-rays and an ultrasound.  The ultrasound was done to look for possible hernias.  The ultrasound was negative and I find out the x-ray results this Friday.  They did say I could have pelvic adhesion's from my surgeries and that could be causing the pain.

I had some allergy test done and had a delayed rare reaction to mold.  Anyways, the Allergist said there is a link between my crazy sensitive skin and Hashimoto's.  So I have some new information on my allergies.  This is great :)

I had to go back to my PCM because I am not digesting my food properly, and having nausea and vomiting.  I swear if it isn't one thing it is 50 million more.  I did an x-ray and on Thursday I have a CT scan to check for blockages and hernias.  I may have Celiac Disease as well.  

I go for my second opinion with a new Endocrinologist on June 19th.  She is also an OBGYN and Reproductive Endocrinologist so she can help me in many ways.  She is trained in advanced tubal obstruction surgery as well.  Maybe she can take a look to see if she can clear my tube.  That would be awesome!!!!  I have been looking more into adoption so we have a better picture for both IVF and Adopting.  We will have to do some soul searching, have more medical questions answered, and save a lot of money before we can do either. 

Next post will be about my feelings towards IVF, adoption and how in the world we will pay for it.

Until next time.....